Rebel Yell!!

The past three mornings I've promised myself that I would wake up at 6 AM, drink a glass of eggs (ROCKY!) and run straight to the gym and work it out. I've broken my promise three times, until this morning when I finally pulled myself up, drank a glass of eggs, and headed over to the BTF.
I had a whole routine that I picked up off the homepage of BODY BUILDER. I was going to walk on the treadmill for five minutes to warm up, then stretch, work on my lats (65lbs - 8 sets), biceps (75bs - 8 sets), opposite of biceps (75lbs - 8 sets), legs (100lbs - 8sets), back (90lbs - 8 sets), and chest (400lbs - 16 sets).
I was so happy to find that the gym was pretty much vacant since it was 6:30AM and most people in my neighborhood don't get up until noon. I went to "warm-up" on the treadmill and found that it was "OUT OF ORTER". I went to the other treadmill and it had the same misspelled notice. Unreal!! Per the homepage I had to walk for at least five minutes before hitting the iron.
I asked the lady at the counter if there were any operative treadmills. She said 'no' and that I should try the stationary bike. The stationary bike!? I explained to her that the BODYBUILDER directions had specifically said "treadmill" but she had stopped paying attention. I got so mad that I began to yell into my sleeve for a solid 30 to 40 seconds. The lady at the counter was pretty weirded out at that point and asked me if I would like her to call the police. I said 'no' and left. When I got home I found another dead bird on my doorstep.

(the dead bird)